Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Out of the blue
Last night, I had one of those times when, out of the blue, the pain from the miscarriage hits you and you just break down. It hasn't happened in a while now, but I'm guessing the approach of Gianna's due date is what spurred the reoccurrence. I guess I was hoping the joy from my current pregnancy would somehow balance out the pain of losing Gianna...not that this new baby could ever replace little Gianna, but just help with the hurt. It seems I had also assumed that I was doing well, but maybe the pain never goes away completely...does it? I know it hasn't with Ariana...sometimes I get out the little box we made with remembrances of her brief life here on Earth, and just feel. Sometimes I feel the joy of the truth and sometimes I feel the pain of loss. And so, I continue to heal, and maybe through God's grace, the break downs will stop one day, but until then, let us pray for one another.
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Sarah, I totally agree! The pain never completely goes away, even with each further pregnancy. We are approaching the due date of our 3 miscarried baby in January, and I keep thinking how different things would be if Lucy would be joining us.
For us now, and our future pregnancies, I continue to ask for the intercession of our children. They made it to heaven, and now lift us up in prayer. I know that is how we have been able to get through this difficult year!
Congrats on your pregnancy! I will continue to keep you in prayer!!
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