What I heard that I didn't want to hear

There were so many things that I heard when telling people of our miscarriages that I didn't want to hear...things like "you're young, you'll have more," "there must have been something wrong with the baby," "your son must not be ready for a little brother or sister" and perhaps the worst was "it was just tissue." How are we to respond to people who say things that are not sensitive, true, or comforting? I am sure that most people mean well when they respond with comments like these, so I usually (if I'm in an emotional state where I can do this) try to gently and lovingly present them with the truth. I do this for each and every one of you, so that God willing, word will get around and not everyone will have to hear these things; I do it for the person making the comment because they probably do not realize that what they are saying is hurtful, not helpful; I do it for the sake of my baby and all babies, who need the world to realize their humanity; and I do it for God because I want the truth of His creation to be known throughout the world. If I'm not in the emotional state to be able to do this, I simply pray. Pray that the truth will penetrate our culture, and pray that despite what others may say, I will always remember the sanctity of each and every human life.

"the plans I have for you..."

"'For I know well the plans I have in mind for you,' says the LORD, 'plans for your welfare, not for woe! Plans to give you a future full of hope!'" Jeremiah 29:11

Having miscarried two of my three children, I started reflecting on why God allowed Francisco, our son, to live and not Ariana and Gianna. He could have taken all three up to Himself, but He did not. It is important to God that Francisco is here on Earth. I began thinking, God must have a special plan for Francisco, that he should be allowed to live...which led me to think, why are any of us still here? God must have a plan for us as well...and not just any plan, a unique plan, a plan for our salvation, unlike any other. He has plans for our sanctification, plans for great love, probably plans for great sacrifice, plans for us to give and get mercy: our path to heaven. What is His plan for me? Do I constantly seek to discover His divine will in my life, or do I prefer my own? My own is filled with pride, despair and grief. His is full of joy, love, and hope. How easy is it to fall to despair when we lose a child unless we know that God's plans are for our welfare and the welfare of our children? The pain is real, and I do not discount that we will feel pain, but even through pain and great sorrow, we can find a wellspring of joy and hope, knowing that our good God works all things for His glory.